Right Fighting
Perspective, this is something I have blogged on many times throughout the years. This is an important part of the energy healing journey. Learning to see other people’s perspectives, understand your own, and not engage in defensive or passive energies can completely change your manifesting abilities.
Right Fighting
Right fighting is an unhealthy approach to arguments where the focus is on winning rather than finding a solution or understanding the other person's viewpoint.
Here are some key aspects of right fighting:
Need To Be Right: Right fighters prioritize being proven correct over everything else. Their self-worth can become tied to the outcome of the argument.
Win/Lose Mentality: They see arguments as a competition where one person must win and the other must lose.
Poor Communication: Right fighters interrupt, focus on defending their position, and don't actively listen to the other person's perspective.
This type of arguing can damage relationships and hinder progress on any issue being discussed. It can also completely stress your own energetic system out and you don’t make much progress in getting what you actually want.
Your Point of View
In relationships, we spend a lot of time trying to be seen. Our points of view, convincing others to see our side of things, trying to get people to acknowledge the efforts you have put in, etc. No matter how hard you try to be seen and how much you are seen, they are still seeing their point of view and vice versa. It is impossible for anyone to completely see your point of view because there is only one seat at that table.
All of your life experiences make you unique in how you perceive things. Scientists have studied this concept for a long time. They have studied consciousness, identical twins, and things like the Mandela effect (false collective memories.)
When I do sessions that involve a family or couple, I decode the perspectives for the others to where they have "aha!" moments about their communication space. They can see how they're causing misunderstandings by assuming the person is hearing them the way they hear themselves. They begin to understand that the misunderstandings are not personal or about their family members not wanting to hear them, but rather that they have their own filters they listen with. It seems to relieve stress in the relationship and help them to accept each other more.
This is important to remind yourself of because when you are trying to understand or be understood, there is no right or wrong answer. There is no definitive "this is the way things are."
There is More Than One Way to be “Right”
We often spend a lot of energy trying to get to "right" vs. "wrong" and, because of perspective, what is “right” is different for everyone. For example, just because you feel better doing Yoga doesn’t make doing Peloton wrong for someone else. The best part is, this is okay! Diversity is actually the best part of manifesting. There are a million “right ways”! It is wonderful that every one sees the world differently. It helps us realize the possibilities of our human form. Our evolutionary possibilities are endless because we all see things differently.
Are you spending energy and time trying to understand someone's point of view or have them understand yours? Step back for a minute from this process. See it for what it is and the possibilities this is creating. By even considering someone else’s reality or them considering yours, you create space for both to exist.
Embrace who you are and how you think. This is your gift to the world. Share it with an open mind and open heart. Encourage others to do the same.
Check Your Manipulations with Rescuing
We all want to help others and we even want to be helped in our times of need. But the desire to save someone can slide into unhealthy territory - becoming manipulation disguised as kindness. This type of “rescuing” isn't about genuine support; it's about gaining control and feeling needed.
Sometimes the energy of rescuing has the belief that you are doing it right and someone else has somehow gotten it wrong. It assumes someone else’s journey is off track, while yours is on track. Souls do all kinds of crazy things to explore consciousness. No matter how you measure your success and existence, it may not be what someone else came to manifest.
How your energy can get lost in this exchange:
Destroys Agency: Being constantly rescued robs people of the opportunity to solve problems themselves and learn from their experiences. It can lead to a sense of learned helplessness. It can also put you on the hook for doing nothing else.
Prevents True Connection: Relationships based on “saving” are fundamentally unbalanced, and real intimacy is impossible when someone is always in the role of being fixed.
Not Sustainable: At some point, the rescued individual might push back, feeling suffocated. The rescuer may feel betrayed, leading to more manipulation to maintain the dynamic.
Before you act on behalf of another, check-in. What is your perspective and how can you change it up?